I've passed
to a lonely place
of solitude,
beyond the gates
of society
into peace of mind.
The whispers of my past
call out to me,
"When will you return?"
My eyes closed tight
and my arms stretched outward
like a martyr
on a cross,
I cry, "No sooner
shall I return
then the gates of Heaven
open wide."
My soul
knows nothing more
than this open sky
before me.
My heart
feels nothing,
but a cool wind
surrounding my mind.
Oh, my love,
search me!
Oh, my heart's desire,
come and become me!
There is nothing more
I know but here.
Nothing-
save the presence
of my destiny.
Earth below me;
blue sky above me;
I am coming home.
2-28-92
Elegy for Ian Curtis
Like an encaged child
withheld from innocence
endlessly seeking substance,
you explored death's edge
You dove into blackness,
hoping to find pure light.
A deep desperate voice cried,
"I'm ashamed of the things
I've been put through;
I'm ashamed of the person
I am."
You cried like death's doorbell,
"Mother, I tried;
please, believe me."
Swimming through madness,
you only wanted more.
Catapulting into a fatalistic melody,
your music became your solace
of twisted expression.
The child never freed
to walk the path of sanity's light;
a child forever waiting on the wings
watching the scenes replay.
2-10-92
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