My Pathetic Situation

Are you suspecting
I doubt it
As I sit shedding
and drinking
I wonder what
I can do to make
you want me
When I'm missing
no one is looking
so I go unfound
My eyes open
I need a ticket
would you validate
you won't
is there a point
am I transparent
does this mean
we aren't even friends
Damn, I hate pity
my pathetic situation
being fourteen again
Low self image
my words are plain
and boring as hell
You forgot because
it is easy
to not remember
someone as obvious
and desperate
I wish I could
stop trying to give
the benefit of the doubt

8-6-95